It Returns
by Celtic karate
Summary: Scully's Cancer returns and she decides to let Mulder go; But does it work. Rated T for for F bomb and hints at sex. M/other then finally msr. I only own Jane and the plot, nothing else. Please don't sue, I rather need my money!
1. Chapter 1 Scully

It Returns

1

Scully

She sat at the bar holding back tears as she thought about the last few months. She had left early that morning after that night, to go to a doctor's appointment before work though she didn't want to leave him that way; with his mother's suicide hanging over him, but Skinner stopped by so she went. She had blood drawn and a CT scan done; all to confirm her continued remission. She wanted to celebrate her continued remission with him as they had always done. But it was not be, the cancer had come back, another mass was growing behind her nasal cavity. She did not know how to tell him or if she even wanted to tell him. So she didn't tell him right away, yet the more she thought about it the more she became sure that if anything should happen to her that he would not be able to move on and the closer they got to each other the surer that, that result would happen. So in order to save him; she made a promise to herself not to tell him. She also decided to start distancing herself from him.

That next week she started to put her plan in motion: she started to take her lunch separately and by the end of the week she was rarely in the Basement Office; instead finishing up her paperwork in her little cubby on the second floor or in a quiet office at Quantico after finishing an autopsy. When he started asking about it during the second week she said that being near the body while writing up her reports was a little more helpful, plus she could pull help from the other experts who worked at the lab there. And her office was quiet and didn't run the risk of having a pencil dropped on her head so she could type up her reports in peace. He didn't look totally convinced but let it go and did not ask her about it anymore.

Outside of work she also started limiting her contact with him. She didn't come over to his place, making him come to her and when he got there they would only watch one movie and they would never sit together. He would leave very confused and she would ignore the sinking in her heart. She kept telling herself that this distancing would make it easier for him to get over her eventual death by cancer. And he had to survive.

She sought no treatment this time around nor did she pray, it was futile, she may have gotten back into her faith but that did not eradicate half a lifetime of science. The only person she told was her mother who she made promise not to tell anyone: not Mulder or any family friends. Mulder eventually stopped coming by and she only stopped by the Basement Office in the mornings; going to her desk or Quantico by noon. It was going okay for her until Mulder decided to do some surveillance on this woman whom he believed to be not only a serial killer but also have the ability to disappear before authorities could arrest her. Trapped in a crappy apartment with only Mulder for company, she thought that he was going to try to find out what had happened between them and she knew that while her intentions were to protect him that if he even so much as asked she would tell him. So it was a relief in a way when Skinner called him to investigate something else and left her to continue the surveillance on the woman.

After she called him to let him know how it all turned out she recalled an earlier conversation while she was on a "vacation" in Maine and he asked her to marry him. And she felt her heart constrict painfully. She hoped he would be able to move on. He had to.

And yet some part of her didn't. Some part of her wanted him to waste away with his grief and be faithful to her memory. Some part of her wanted him to bust through her apartment door and demand to know why she had been distant from him lately. She wanted him to proclaim is undying love for her and push her up against the wall and kiss her until she fell into his arms; and she would kiss him back and tell him everything and she would start to fight again. She would fight to keep her life and fight to be with Mulder. Yet . . . She knew that he would respect her choices and that she would have to go to him. But she couldn't. She needed him to survive and continue to find the truth for both their sakes'.

Little did she know that fate would tear them apart and bring them together once again . . .

Two more weeks passed with their new pattern and other people started noticing the apparent strain this was causing both agents and whispered behind their backs about the cause, but Scully continued to ignore them just as they had always done. The following Monday they had a meeting with Skinner so she stopped by her second floor desk to grab her files before she went to remind Mulder about their meeting. Yet when she got to the office and unlocked the door, she found the room empty. Stopping for a moment and her brow wrinkling together in frustration. She was about to turn around and go up to the meeting and hoped he showed up when he heard his whistling coming down the hall. She turned around just as he came in the door. He was wearing one of his dark grey suits with a white dress shirt and a simple black tie. He stopped when he saw her in the doorway and the smile he had on his face faded away to be replaced with a look of apprehension. But then that look vanished behind his mask. And when he decided to speak his voice had scorn, hurt and anger laced through it.

"So the elusive Special Agent Dana Scully finally comes to see her partner. What can I do for you today Agent Scully?"

"We have a meeting with Skinner. I was coming down to remind you." Her voice was flat, toneless and emotionless. Her face was the same way. She was in no mood to deal with little attitudes and moods. She left the office with him following behind and they waited in a very uncomfortable silence. The meeting dragged on and a new case was assigned so after the meeting she followed him to the elevator and down to the Basement Office. They worked in silence until lunch, took lunch then started working again. About halfway through the afternoon silence a knock was heard. Mulder got up and answered the door. After a few seconds he stepped back and allowed the woman who knocked to enter the office; she stopped at the sight of Scully and looked to Mulder. Who again had the same look on his face as this morning didn't notice.

The woman who stood next to her partner is tall, not as tall as Mulder but close her eyes came up to his nose. She was to use the phrase "busty", busty. She had curves that suggested she worked out, dance and weights was Scully's guess. She was pretty, Scully had to admit her eyes were a creamy chocolate that danced and could not hide her emotions like Mulder's hazel or Scully's Icy blues could. Her hair was a dark shade of brown almost black and was straight and went down to her shoulders. Her brown eyes narrowed as she took in Scully's gaze and sent one right back. Finally when Scully noticed that her partner wasn't going to introduce them she stood up and walked over the woman.

"Special Agent Dana Scully." She said extending her hand to shake the other's hand.

"Jane Brock." She replied shaking hands with Scully. "Uhmmm . . . I don't mean to be rude but who are you, I have never seen you before?"

"No need to feel your being rude. I am Agent Mulder's partner. And I could ask the same of you." Was Scully's polite reply.

"I am Fox's girlfriend."

_Girlfriend? She calls him Fox?_

"That's nice how long have you been going out?"

"Since I got back from the Crittendon/ Adderly case; I met her in the train station." Mulder speaks at last.

"Oh really, how nice." My reply was strained as my heart broke; so he had moved on before I even died, did he even love me in the first place? I most have spun off into the collapsing world of my heart and missed the next few minutes of conversation between the others. When Mulder said my name I had to make a huge effort to bring myself back. They were inviting me to eat a late lunch/early dinner with them I could hear myself saying no: I had paperwork to finish and my mother was coming over tonight. Which was only half true my mom was coming though.

So they left and after she heard the elevator close she waited for a few more minutes than cleaned out the rest of her stuff from her little area of the office and returned to the second floor to get ready to go home.

Scully came out of her reprieve by the sound of the bar door opening and looking up she saw that it was just another patron, not who she was waiting for. That last memory had been at the end of April it was now early August. She had gotten a call from Jane while she was sitting in the Doctor's office waiting to get her latest test results on the progress of her cancer. She had agreed to meet Jane here after the appointment. Seeing as how she was not here just yet she let herself slip back into her memories.

It was early July and Mulder had asked her to come over to his apartment and she agreed. Once she was there she noticed that Jane had moved in with him. _Another blow to my heart_. Jane greeted her and took her coat and asked her to sit down on the couch as she moved into the kitchen to continue cooking and Mulder came out of the bedroom and sat on the chair to the desk. After a few minutes Jane came into the room and moved to sit on Mulder's lap. As she sat down Mulder kissed her forehead and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"We have a few minutes before dinner is ready baby." She told Mulder who smiled at her. She then turned to me. "Dana, we have some news to tell you. We are getting married!" At her exited proclamation my heart shattered and through a force of will that I didn't even know I had I kept from reacting with sorrow and put a smile on my face as I gave them both my congratulations; but my body had decided to react to the news and the stress I was putting it under my clamping down on my emotions that my nose started to bleed. I could feel the blood start to fall down my face and into my stomach, making me sick. I stood up suddenly and rushed into Mulders bathroom and to the toilet just in time as my stomach rejected the blood. After I had emptied my stomach I sat on his, not their bathroom floor weakly. Eventually I remembered that my nose was bleeding and grabbed some toilet paper and put to my nose and moved my head forward over the toilet bowl. After a few minutes Jane came in to see if I was okay, I just ignored her putting all of my focus into stopping my nose bleed so I could leave and go home to cry myself to sleep . . . again.

Twenty minutes later my nose had stopped bleeding and I was going to go home. When I decided to speed up some of my plans regarding work, I was going to leave now and not wait for the cancer to start to make me weak. And I was going to tell him before I left tonight and never see him again. I stood up from where I was sitting on their bathroom floor. I left the room and made my way back into the living room.

"Hey Mulder?" I called, he came out of the kitchen and looked at me.

"Yeah Scully? You doing ok there?"

"I'm fine, don't worry about me. But I wanted to tell you something. I was going to wait until I saw you in the office, but I think I need to tell you this now; before things get any more complicated." I took a deep breath and his eyes told me to continue.

"I am giving my two weeks' notice to Skinner on Monday, Mulder, I have decided it's time for me to leave the FBI." I finished in a rush and looked away to avoid his eyes; I didn't want to see what they held or as the case may be: not see.

"Ok then, good luck then and thanks for telling me beforehand. What are you going to do? Go and practice medicine or something? He asked me in a voice that to anyone else might seem a bit odd, but to me it was the voice of his mask, a voice that I hadn't heard in years.

"No I am not going to practice medicine; I would have to quit in a few months' time anyways." That was all I was going to tell him about my situation. Let him figure it out, if he wanted to.

"Oh okay. Bye then; see you around then."

"Good bye Mulder." _Good bye and see you in whatever is after this life._ I grabbed my coat and left without saying a word to Jane. I made it home before the sobs and tears caught up with me and I just lay on the floor in front of my door and cried myself to sleep.

A hand on my shoulder pulled me from my reprieve this time I looked around to see Jane standing next to me. Giving her a tight smile I move my coat off of the seat next to me so she could sit down and we could talk. She sat down and the bartender came and took her order and returned with it a few minutes later.

She sipped on her drink and then took a deep breath. She started to say something but then decided not to. So I decided to ask and just be straight up with her.

"Did you need me for something Jane? When we talked on the phone earlier it sounded like it was important?" There I said it, now it is her turn.

"Yes I did Agent Scully. I wanted to say I was sorry that this is the first time that we have seen each other, though Fox says that he has not seen you since I had either and not to worry about it. I hope that our sudden announcement did not catch you off guard or make you uncomfortable in any way . . ." She trailed off uncertain of what to say now. My turn again.

"No its okay you didn't and I am fine. No my FBI trained gut says that you wanted to talk about something other than that night, am I right?" Her turn once more.

"Your gut is correct. After you left Fox seemed so down and he wouldn't tell me why. I kept after him about it and he eventually told me some stuff about the two of you." She stopped to take a drink and look at me. She had my interest now.

"What did he say about us?"

"He told me how you met and about that first case, your father dying, his father dying and you shooting him. He told me about your sister's murder and how he felt like he was to blame. He told me that you were taken and left barren, then how you got cancer and how it went into remission. He told me that you kissed at the Millennium and that he thought that he loved you. He also told me that you were distancing yourself from him and that you had started to ignore him."

"And you are wondering about what? It sounds like he told you everything."

"Do you love him?" Finally there we have now we are taking about what she wanted to ask. Here we go I will tell her everything, no holds, she deserves to know. So I told her the truth.

"Yes. Yes I love him. I love him with all my heart. A heart that shatters each and every time he leaves me. Every time he looks at another female. Every time he looks or holds you." My eyes start to well up and she notices.

"Then why did you hurt him by distancing yourself from him. If you love someone then you don't hurt them." Accusation was in her tone as she hurled that question at Scully.

"Because if I told him that I loved him and we became a couple, like I wanted to be, then in a few months' time he would be completely devastated and the vortex of his emotions would pull himself so low that eventually all he would feel is his pain." The pain was in my voice as I told her my prediction of what would happen to Mulder after my death.

"Why?" Her tone softening.

"Because, if we were to consummate our mutual feelings then my death would be impossible for him get over because that would mean that everyone he has loved has in some form abandoned him to his madness, his vortex."

"Your dying?"

"Yes. My cancer is back. I only have about four months left at the rate the cancer is growing and spreading."

"I am sorry."

"Don't be. It is what it is. However I would ask that you only tell Mulder if you have to. He will only blame himself and I want him to be happy. That is all I want for him is to be happy. I wish that he could be happy with me, but soon he would only be a living ghost. Not able to feel anything but pain and grief."

"Okay I won't tell him and I understand why you are doing this. You are trying to make your death less to him, so he can continue to live. You really do love him. Were you ever going to tell him?"

"Yes I was. I was going to invite him over to my apartment and tell him then. I was going to wait until I had my cancer-remission test results back. The result should have been no cancer; remission still in effect. I would have celebrated 3 years of cancer remission by telling my soul-mate, my other half that I was in love with him." I finally broke down and started sobbing, and even though I am sure that she does not like me at all she still pulled me into an embrace and held me until my tears stopped coming, until I ran dry. We went our separate ways: Jane to Mulder and myself to my lonely, half-packed apartment.


	2. Chapter 2 Jane

It Returns

2

Jane

Her words echoed in my head. And while I wanted to hate every fiber of her being for hurting my man the way she did, I can't, because I now know why she did it. She loves him so much that she will break her own heart to keep him alive after she has gone; after she dies.

I don't know if I could do that to someone I love. Actually I know I couldn't. My own selfish need of comfort from that one person; the one person who I would need to distance to protect. My own need would outweigh that need to protect.

In that moment I knew That Dana Scully loved Fox Mulder more than I ever could. But that made me wonder how much Fox loved her. As I pondered on that question as I pulled into the parking lot; I was hit by memories.

The first was the day when I first met Dana Scully. She was short. That was the only flaw I could find with her. And yet you did not notice her short stature because you could see that this was a very strong woman. She carried herself with grace and confidence that did not become arrogance. I caught her giving me the once over and glared at her but she shrugged and stood up to shake my hand and introduce herself. Afterwards when Fox had spoken and I looked at him and not his partner I saw a look like he regretted something and when she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, a look of sheer pain crossed his features, the pain of knowing what he was doing to the woman he loved.

I got out of the elevator and entered the empty apartment: Mulder was out of town helping his boss with a consult or something and was coming home tomorrow. Not feeling hungry I just got ready for bed and as I lay there waiting for sleep to come another memory crashed upon me: The night we told her we were getting married.

After she ran to the bathroom Fox made to follow her and I stopped him; telling him to give her some space. After ten minutes passed and she still had not returned I went into the bathroom to see if she needed anything; she ignored me with her head leaning over the edge of the toilet blood running down from her nose. So I left. Twenty minutes later she returned and I heard her tell Fox that she was quitting and after she left and we sat down to dinner. He did not eat very much that night and his face held the look of one who was betrayed by the person he trusted the most. It was then that I knew that my fiancé was in love with another female. But that did not mean that he loved her more then he loved me. So I pestered him about her and about their relationship to each other and after a week he finally told me. He told me in many words what I told Dana that he told me. He did say that he thought he loved her, but I knew that was a lie. He _knew_ he loved her.

Now I just needed to find out how much.

Fox was tired when he came home; he came into the apartment and set his bag down on the floor. He then came over and greeted me with a kiss on the cheek. He then went over to the fridge and pulled out a beer and sat down on the couch. I grabbed a bottle of water and went to sit next to him; he put his arm around me and I leaned into his shoulder. I knew that this might be the last time we sat like this. I took a deep breath and started speaking; I needed to know this. I would not marry someone who loved someone else more than me.

"How upset were you when Dana told you she was leaving? And don't feed me some bull story; I want the truth Fox!"

"Okay the truth . . . I felt betrayed, for a long time she was the only one I trusted; then she became my best friend, someone who drove the old nightmares away while replacing them with new ones and yet even then she could drive them away for a night; if she only smiled at me. After that night; you kept asking me and eventually I told you that I thought that I loved her. I lied, I do love her. And that only made her distancing herself from me even more painful. So I tried to move on, and I found you," he still doesn't look at me. One last question; this one would decide our next step.

"Do you still love her? Look past the pain and anger at what she has done and tell me: do you love her still?"

He was silent for a moment, a very long moment. Finally when the silence was becoming unbearable he answered with one simple word: "Yes."

That one word broke my heart. Why was this man with me when he clearly belonged to someone else?

"Well then Fox, you should tell her. Tell her that even after her abandonment of you, after her betrayal, you still love her. Go to her Fox don't worry about me; I have thought that this might be the case."

"Why should I tell her Jane? She doesn't love me back."

"No Fox your wrong: she loves you and will love you until her dying breath."

"Wait, what do you mean 'dying breath'?"

"Before I answer your question I want you to sleep on this part of our conversation. In the morning I will ask you again, and if your answer is still the same then I will answer your question. Now go to bed; you look exhausted." He listened to me and went to bed, without kissing me. I knew his answer would be the same. I promised Dana that I would tell Fox if it was necessary. To me in that moment it was, because even if he did marry me he would still fall into 'his vortex' as she called it. So with that in mind I went and sat at the desk and pulled some paper and a pen towards me; I needed to write Dana and explain why I told him.

_Dear Dana,_

_I know I told you that I would not tell Fox about our conversation in the bar, but I saw that you loved him more than I ever could. I wanted to find out if loved you still; even after the pain you put him through. He does. I realized that even if he married me, when you die it will break him and your prediction will come true. So in the morning I will ask again if he still loves you; and then tell him why. Don't be angry, for I too want him happy. And he loves you more than he could ever love me._

_Keep him, don't lose him_

_Jane._

After I finished the letter I went to bed. I got up first the next morning and went to start a pot of coffee. Then minutes later he came out dressed in casual jeans and black t-shirt. I handed him a mug of coffee and asked him again: "Do you love her still?"

"Yes, I still love her." He told me; he then sat in silence waiting for me to tell him why she did what she did.

"Then know this Fox: she ditched because she loves you too." He started to say something but I raised my hand to stop him. "Let me speak. She did this to protect you, like you did, whenever you ditched her on a case. She wanted you to live a happy life; even if that life was without her. She's dying Fox. She told me the Cancer is back and that she only has a few months to live. She thought that if she left you before she died that you would have more time to get over and love someone else. She feared that if she died while you guys were still friends or if you were in a relationship and she died that you would waste away and try to join her by your own hand. Her plan didn't work because you still love her. Now you will get up and go get her flowers, you will go to her apartment and you will tell her, tell her everything. Get her to fight Fox; if not for her or her family, then for you. Don't worry about me Fox, I will be gone before you return, if you return. But do me one last favor: take something to her for me." I got up and walked to the desk and grabbed my letter and gave in to him. He took it gave me one last look.

"Thank you." Then he was out the door.


	3. Chapter 3 Mulder

It Returns

3

Mulder

I left the apartment and Jane without a backwards glance. I left the building and made my way to a flower store to pick up some flowers; I put the note to Scully from Jane in my pocket. I walked into the shop and went to the Rose Section. I picked up a small card that listed what each colored rose meant and started building my bouquet of flowers. I picked up two yellow roses (friendship), two white roses (trust), to pink roses (affection) and four deep red roses (passion). I was about to pick out another two red roses when something stopped me: a pair of blue roses. Now I know that I may not know much about flowers; but I do know that blue roses are incredibly rare and stand for the impossible. So I grabbed those two to complete my bouquet. Then I grabbed another bouquet of carnations to give her.

I approached the cashier and set both bouquets of flowers down. The woman just looked at me. She rang up both bouquets of flowers and put them in a baggie thing that flowers go in. "Can I get you anything else sir?" she asked. I thought for a minute then answered.

"yes, I would like a bouquet of flowers delivered. I want half of the flowers to mean 'I'm sorry' and the other half to mean 'thank you'."

"I can do that for you, where would you like them delivered and when."

I gave her my answer and told her as soon as possible, I put a fifty dollar bill on the table and asked if she could do it tonight or early tomorrow morning. She took the bill and said that it would be done. Then I paid for the other flowers and left back to my apartment and my car. I drove in silence to Georgetown and Scully.

I arrived at her apartment and saw her car parked outside filled with boxes. I was curious so I went up to her apartment. When I reached her floor I saw that her door was open; so I peeked inside.

What I saw shocked me; she was almost finished packing. Boxes opened and closed were scattered around the floor. And Scully sat where her couch used to be going through the contents of the box in front of her. I knocked lightly on the door; she didn't hear me. I knocked a little harder and still she did not look up. "Scully." I called to her; this time she did look up. When her eyes met mine I saw for a brief moment pure agony mixed with pure love; then it was hidden behind the icy persona that was the 'Ice Queen' Scully was called.

"What are you doing here Mulder?" her voice was flat, emotionless and monotone. I walked into the room and sat down next to her; I noticed that she would not meet my eyes. She stared blankly at the box she was looking at before I came in. Silently I placed the bouquet of carnations in front of her face.

"What are these for Mulder?" she asked me confusion in her voice.

"Don't carnations mean 'get well'?" I asked keeping the roses behind my back and reaching for Jane's note.

"Yes Mulder, they do. But why would you give them to me?" She asked quietly. I wished that she would look me in the eye so I would know what she was thinking.

"Here, let this answer your question." I handed her Jane's note and let her read. For every second that passed I could see a crack forming in her icy façade. When she reached the end tears were pooling unshed in her eyes. She looked up at me.

"Doubtless she said that she told me and that I love you to, but I want to tell you in my own way." I brought out the roses; and pulled the pair of white ones from the bunch.

"White roses mean trust. I trust you with everything Dana." I passed her one of the white roses. She took it and inhaled deeply. "Do you trust me Scully?"

"I told you before Mulder: you're the only one I would risk my career for." I handed her the other white rose before pulling out the yellow roses.

"The yellow rose means friendship. You earned mine by standing by me. You became my best friend." I handed her one of the yellow roses. "Am I your friend Scully?"

"Yes, Mulder you are my best friend and the only one who knows me as well as my father." I handed her the second rose and pulled the pink roses from the bunch.

"They tell me that pink roses mean affection and caring. All my innuendos and little touches were supposed to show that I felt those things for you." Again I passed one of the roses to her. "Do you feel those for me Scully?"

"If I didn't I would have not let you touch me and filed a sexual harassment suit against you Mulder." Again I passed the other rose to her. Now I pulled out two of the red roses.

"Red means passion. However passion to me at least means two things. One meaning is anger. Scully this abandonment of me has pissed me the fuck off and so I think that anger, fury and rage fall into the passion category; even if no one else does." Passing the rose to her I asked this question. "Do I infuriate you Scully?" This time my voice held some of that rage and anger I felt towards her. She smiled slightly before answering.

"All the time Mulder. From your porn collection to your seed habit. And some days more than others. But you said you had two meanings, what's your second?" Silently I handed her the pair and pulled out the next set of red roses.

"The other meaning of passion is lust and love. Scully you turn me on. At first I thought it was just lust, but then you had cancer and I learned that it was love and not lust. Do I turn you on and do you love me in return." I passed her one of the last red roses.

"Yes." She whispered the word so softly I almost didn't hear her. And I passed her the last red rose and pulled the blue ones.

"Now blue roses are incredibly rare and almost impossible to find therefore they represent the impossible. You are also rare, Scully. You are a unique mixture of science and faith; by-the-rules woman and rule breaker. And I love you for it. Even if I married someone else or you died; I would still love you. I would find it impossible to ever, _ever_ stop loving you." I passed her one of the blue roses, and locked eyes with her; my eyes silently asking a question that had no words.

"Mulder I will love you until I take my last breath. It is now impossible for me not to love you." I handed her the last of the roses. She gathered up the rest of the roses and wandered to the kitchen where I followed her. She grabbed a vase that was sitting on the counter with the rest of her kitchen stuff. She placed the roses in the vase and filled it with water. I could see her taking deep breaths before she spoke; then she looked me straight in the eyes and started.

"I don't know where to start Mulder. I had decided that I would tell you that I loved you when I got my results back, I mean when it was confirmed that I was still in remission. But when I found out that a new tumor was growing in the same place that knowing that your sister was dead and that I was dead helping you to search for her, would kill you. Even if you didn't love me the way I loved you. I thought it would be best if I cut myself out of your life while I was still alive; to give you time to adjust before I passed. I should never have done that, because like me, you don't like to be ditched. But I needed you to live.

"Some part of me wanted you to fight me, make me come back. But you respected my wishes, even if they went unspoken, about leaving me alone. I love you Fox Mulder, but know I want to be happy, with you." She looked away after she finished speaking, but not before I saw pure love and need in every line of her face.

Slowly I walked towards her and lifted her face with my hand. I leaned forward and touched my forehead to hers. "Can you ever forgive me the pain and anger I put you through?" My answer was to put the sweetest kiss I could on her lips. I pulled away and told her my answer.

"I already have." And then I kissed her again. This time with a little more passion, she responded and kissed me back. I could have died right then. When we pulled back for air I had one more question for her.

"You said you wanted me to fight for you. How?"

"I wanted you to demand why I was being distant, because I would tell you, I can't lie to you. I can lie for you but not to you. Then I wanted you to tell me that you loved me and push me against the wall and kiss me until I was senseless. Then you would have told me to fight. Fight to stay alive, for you, for us; fight to be with you. And I would have, I still would. "

I gave her what she wanted. I pushed her against the wall and kissed her like there was no tomorrow. I let my tongue trace her lower lip before pushing into her non-resistant mouth and tasting her. She kissed me back and I felt her knees start to buckle. I brought my hands to the back of her thighs and lifted her into the air against me. She wrapped her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck.

Finally I needed air, so I pulled back and gulped in air before moving my mouth to her neck. I found a spot near her collarbone that made a moan escape from her lips as she clutched at me. "Senseless yet?" I teased her. She couldn't speak, so she just nodded. I stopped kissing her and just rested my forehead against hers.

"Will you fight for us Scully?" I asked after we had both caught our breath.

"I will always fight Mulder, from now on, I will always fight."


	4. Chapter 4

It Returns Epilogue 1

I wake up the next morning with Mulder's arms wrapped around me on my bed in my almost empty room. We had made love all day yesterday, but after the initial confrontation between us, there was no conversation, just sex. I felt that we need to talk, so I tried to turn around to face him, but his arms were like a vice around my waist, trapping me. I dropped my hands to cover his and start to stroke them starting from his fingers and ending at his elbow. After a few minutes his grip on my relaxes and I lift the hand that was on top of me and bring it to my lips and kiss it before turning over and letting his hand settle again, but this time on my lower back. I watch him as he sleeps, not quite ready to wake him up and talk.

His face is relaxed and his lips are twitched up in a slight smile. He looks beautiful and I am reminded about my promise to fight, fight to live, fight for us. And I realize that I am totally and irrevocably in love with the man who has his arms around me. I reach out my hand and trace my fingers over is forehead, eyes, nose, lips and chin; before heading back up and running my hand through his hair. His hair is soft and feels like silk. I am struck by the irony that is hair.

I mean, women go to great lengths by putting in special oils and using special (and expensive) shampoos and conditioners to get their hair to feel like this and all men do is wash it whenever they take a shower and their hair feels like a dream. I watch as his half-smile grows and start to put more pressure as I rub his scalp. I know he's awake, but I keep rubbing his scalp anyway; he'll repay me in the shower.

Oh yeah, he's definitely awake. I can feel his morning glory grow even more as I massage his scalp. So I stop and move my other hand to his head and bring my mouth to his and kiss him. And if I thought his morning glory grew as I massaged his scalp, then it exploded when I kissed him. I let him roll on top of me and proceed to make love to me; again.

Afterwards we lay curled up together, sated. I had my head on his chest and my hand over his heart. His arms were wrapped around me once again. I am so sated, that I could fall asleep again, but I know I can't do that. So I sit up and stretch, before rolling out of bed. I feel his eyes on me the entire time, so I turn to him and grin before sauntering off the bathroom.

************************************X-Files************************************

My doctor seemed shocked when, I asked for an appointment a week later. Mulder pulled into the parking lot and got out with me. We held hands as we walked into the building. I signed in and sat with him in a corner. I leaned against him and rested my eyes, feeling him run his hands through my hair and his kisses to my temple, forehead and crown.

Finally my name was called and we followed the nurse back to the exam rooms, where my height and weight were taken. I was led into a room and given a hospital issue gown to change into with the nurse telling me the doc would be right in. I quickly changed into the gown and sat on the exam table while Mulder sat in the chair near me and had a death-grip on my hand and I on his.

The doctor came in and saw me with someone else, and from the look in her eyes; I think she understood why I had made this appointment.

"What can I do for you today Dana?" She asked.

"I want to fight, I want to live." I told her in a firm voice, but not looking at her. My eyes were locked with Mulder's.

"Why now and not sooner?" She asks next.

"Because now I have a reason to live. A damned fine reason to live. I have a new life to live and by God; I want this new life." I told her, still looking at Mulder. He gave me a smile and brought my hand up to his lips and pressed a kiss to the back of my hand.

The doctor took a deep breath before talking again.

"What if I told you it was too late; the cancer has spread too far? Just for clarification."

"I would find a new doctor and get their opinion." I was firm in my answer; this doctor had yet to really deal with the Scully family stubbornness.

"What if the other doctor told you the same thing?" She was pressing, and I had no clue why.

"Then I would find a way to live this life to the fullest for however long I had left." I am starting to get angry, but it fades to confusion as I see a small smile com over her face as she nods.

"Good. Now that you've said that I have a few ideas about how to treat your cancer. Now I want you to know before we start that I have no clue if it'll work. But here is my plan: No more alcohol, cut down on the coffee and other caffeinated drinks. I want you to run or walk a mile or two everyday if possible, I don't want you to have any loud fights, and I want to keep your stress levels down. I want you to gain a few pounds in muscle and fat. This part of the plan is to get you as healthy as possible, because phase 2 will drain your body; you'll get worse before you get better. As we start with phase 1 I am going to line up tests: an MRI every two weeks to track the growth as well as blood tests every week. While this is going on I am going to set up a chemo treatment plan as a plan B, but I want to see if I can't scramble the tumor out of you like the Ancient Egyptians did for their mummification. Well keep trying until you say stop Dana." She finished talking and looked at us to see if we were on the same page. We were and I nodded and agreed to this treatment plan, knowing that Mulder will partake in this as well; we both need to live healthier lives.

An hour later, after fine tuning some details, we left the office. Mulder drove us back to his apartment where I had moved in, not wanting to live where I had been; plus I had already given it up. We went through the front door and cuddled on the couch, the only sounds were our breaths and heartbeats. But after a time, Mulder started to speak.

"I love you Scully." He told me.

"I love you too, Mulder."

"I need to go into work tomorrow." He was almost whining like a toddler told to go take his nap.

"Mulder we need the money, if I'm going to have an MRI every two weeks and labs every week." I didn't want him to go back, but it was needed.

"Actually we really don't." He seemed a little sheepish at this announcement.

"What? Why?"

"Well I have a trust fund, and my parent's inheritance that they left for me in the will along with everything that they left to Samantha and her trust fund. I haven't done the numbers but with that alone we could live in a small house and pay everything for a few years with just my half, let alone Sam's half. I hope that Sam's half can help with the medical bills."

"Mulder I love you. But you know that you need to work to keep that brain of yours busy."

"I know, but I want to work from home a lot, profiles don't require you to be in the office a whole lot."

"What about the X-Files?" We had talked mainly about me and us this past week, not what was going on at the Hoover building. So I had no clue about what he was taking about.

"Well, a few weeks after you left, the division's solve-rate dropped drastically and Skinner had orders from higher up to shut down the X-Files. I was transferred back to the BAU and the Violent Crimes division; back to profiling. It worked for me; I knew what happened to my sister and I was involved with someone, so staying in town except for special cases seemed ideal." He shrugged and I picked my head up from his chest to look at him. His eyes told me that he really didn't mind his quest for the truth being shut down.

"Why'd the rate drop?"

"I went off after half-baked schemes and didn't follow protocols like we did. Plus I think it helped me to have to prove everything to you."

"And you don't mind being booted?" I needed clarification on this, because it astounds me, I never would have thought that this was possible.

"Well, at first I did, but it was short lived. And now, I'm sure that if you wanted to come back to work, Skinner would open them back up. But if we do that, our relationship will be moved to the backburner. This is why I never wanted to really start a relationship during my search for Samantha. But now I want us to be well . . . us. If I have to make a choice of having you in my life as a lover or as a partner; I chose lover. What about you Scully?"

"I would chose you as a lover, every single time, Mulder."


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: So this is the final chapter and it will be very long, as it has flashbacks to explain a lot of what has been going on. I couldn't stop writing so you get a long chapter to finish the story off.

It Returns Epilogue 2

Seven Years Later

The small house was like the dream house in the American dream: Small with a large yard, with a white fence around the edge. The front yard was neatly groomed with the lawn nicely mowed and watered and the flower beds near the porch steps were in order and the flowers blooming adding a splash of color against the beige house paint and brown stained deck. Inside the house was organized chaos. The living room was a mess of toys piled in a basket in the corner. The couch was clean and tidy while the coffee table held half-done drawings, old coffee mugs and crayons. The kitchen was in order like the front yard; though it wasn't as well stocked. The family had yet to make their weekly grocery run. In the back of the first floor was a large room, locked to the kids. Inside was a modest office for two: two desks, two computers and large bookshelves and filling cabinets. The second floor held four rooms and two bathrooms. One room, the original master bedroom, was empty. It was only a guest room. The other three rooms were occupied. The medium sized room was a sanctuary to a small 13 year old girl. The room's walls were plain white, but covered with posters and pictures the child had taken.

The two smaller rooms contained sleeping twins; a boy and a girl. The twins were five years old. Their rooms were also just a plain white, but they just had pictures and a couple blank pieces of paper that they could draw on, their mother's idea to stop them from drawing on the walls in the rest of the house. The three kids slept soundly. Upstairs was originally an attic, but the house owners had changed it into a new master bedroom complete with a walk in closet and ensuite bathroom. This was where they slept.

The large man held his diminutive wife in his arms. Her head rested against the left side of his chest right over his heartbeat. His arms were around her waist, keeping her close to him and he had one hand on her neck, feeling the pulse that showed she was alive. This was the way they had fallen asleep every night they were together for the last seven years.

About an hour after the sun had fully risen, the small women woke up. She opened her eyes and smiled before turning her head to kiss her husband's chest; her signal for him to let her go and even in his sleep, he complied. The women sat up in bed and stretched her arms above her head and arched her back; causing her red hair to tumble down her back. She and her husband were eternally grateful that chemo had not been needed to treat her second bout with cancer. The women grabbed her robe from the floor. She stood up and slipped the robe around her still thin frame.

The movement of the springs in the mattress caused her husband to wake up. He slowly blinked open his hazel eyes and smiled at his wife. He stood up and walked over to her before leaning down and kissing her sweetly on the lips, a kiss she returned.

"Good morning Scully." He whispered against her lips.

"Morning Mulder." She returned.

This ritual was the only time they referred to each other by their last names any more. They now called each other by their first names or 'mom' and 'dad.' They took their shower together and got ready for the day. They left their room and walked down one flight of stairs, and opened the doors to check on their children; who were still sleeping soundly, for now. They walked down the last flight of stairs and wandered into the kitchen.

Fox started the coffee machine before heading outside to get the Saturday paper from the driveway. Dana pulled the list from the fridge down, before opening up the fridge, freezer and pantry; adding what they needed, and was not on the list, to the list. Once that was done she pulled out all the ingredients for pancakes. Fox came back in just as the coffee finished brewing. He poured two cups and added their sugar and cream before handing a mug to Dana as she mixed the dry ingredients together. Once the batter was finished and the griddle nice and hot, Fox took over and started to cook the pancakes. Dana then went into the living room and organized the coffee table, bringing the old mugs into the kitchen where she rinsed them before placing them in the dishwasher. She then sat down at the table in the kitchen that was their family dining room.

Soon the smell of pancakes filled the house and it wasn't long before the twins came down the stairs and went straight to their parents. The little girl went to Fox and the boy to Dana. She picked her little man up and held him in her lap. He was still asleep and buried his head in his mother's neck. Dana kissed his forehead and rocked him in her lap. She buried her nose in his brown curls, loving the small hint of his baby scent that still lingered in his hair. Dana remembered the day they found out she was pregnant with the twins.

They had been trying for a few months. They had been married for almost a year and a half and wanted to expand their family. Fox had refused to believe that she could not conceive a child. After seven months of trying, they went to a fertility specialist. She ran extensive tests on both of them before she found a couple eggs in Dana's ovaries. They fertilized them, hoping that at least one of them would grow from a zygote to a little person.

The day Dana took the home pregnancy test and saw the sign for positive was one of the happiest days of her life. But she kept the knowledge to herself until she got the blood work back. Then she told her husband.

Fox loved the day when they found out she was carrying twins. It was the first scan where they could take their time; Mulder, who left the FBI and opened a child psychology office, had closed the practice for the afternoon and Dana had took the afternoon off from the hospital as well. They were sitting in the room, just listening to the heartbeat while the tech did her thing when suddenly the beautiful baby girl sprouted a third arm. As the three adults watched another little baby, who was definitely a boy, moved out from behind his sister and the sound of the heartbeat doubled with both of them having separate pulses. Fox and Dana had cried happy tears.

When the twins were born, and they picked out names; they wanted names similar to the family they had lost, but still were unique. So they decided to name their little girl Sasha Melody Mulder; Sasha for Samantha and Melody for Melissa and their little boy Liam Anthony Mulder, Liam being similar to William, after their fathers' names.

"Good morning Little Man." She whispered into his hair. She let him rest in her lap, until his sister saw her as Fox twirled her around.

"Momma!" The little girl squirmed around until her father let her down. The little girl bolted over to her mother with Fox following behind. He passed his daughter to her mother and scooped up his son just in time as Sasha threw herself onto her mother. Dana laughed and scooped her up and showered her face with kisses as her fingers tickled the five-year olds' sides. Her laughter roused her brother and soon he joined in the fray, tickling his mother. Fox also joined in tickling, Liam.

As the sound of their laughter floated to the second floor, a groan could be heard.

"Well, it looks like Quinn is about ready to join the real world." Dana quipped.

The twins were always up before Quinn and usually went to bed before her too. Dana stood up and had a twin on each hip. She carried her babies up the stairs and into Quinn's room. When the twins saw their sister they went and pounced on the bed and started jabbering all at once.

After a few seconds and when Quinn didn't respond they stopped and looked from Quinn's head to their mother and back.

Suddenly Quinn bolted up and grabbed the twins and started tickling both of them. The twins screeched in surprise and then started to laugh. Quinn tickled her younger siblings until they cried "Uncle!" in there baby talk. She released them and they bolted from their room, knowing that pancakes were almost ready.

Dana watched as they vanished into the kitchen before turning her attention back to her oldest. Quinn's brown hair (hair lighter then Fox's) was cut short, proudly displaying the long jagged white scar that decorated her neck. Her hair was a slight mess, all pushed up on one side, showing Dana just how hard her daughter slept last night. Quinn sat up in the bed and stretched her arms above her head. Her blankets slipped down, revealing the sports bra she slept in and a few more scars dotted across her abdomen and upper chest.

Quinn was adopted by Dana and Fox just a year after the twins were born. Dana had just returned to work and the twins spent some time with their grandmother when she was brought in to the ER at the hospital Dana was now working at; during Dana's ER shift.

Flashback.

_She had come in with severe dehydration and malnutrition as well as several broken ribs and bruises covering the majority of her body as well as the healed scar across her neck. She had refused to tell the EMTs who brought her in any information about herself. She did the same thing to Dana until Dana proved Quinn could trust her. Eventually Quinn told Dana that her step-father was responsible for all the damage, except the scar on her neck, she has had that scar sense she was very little and didn't remember how she got it. Dana immediately called Child Services and the local PD. _

_Quinn's father was quickly arrested. He was denied bail at his arraignment and Quinn stayed in the hospital for a few weeks while she recovered. Once her tests came back all cleared, she was placed in Foster Care with a nice family house. The house was designed for abused kids who were testifying against their supposed protectors; the foster parents were child advocates. She had left the hospital with a business card of Dana's with both Dana's numbers as well as Fox's numbers._

_Four months later the trial was complete, with a guilty verdict and Quinn was moved to a new home. But that family was elderly and soon they were forced by their now grown-up children to move into a nursing home. This caused Quinn to move to a new home in the area. But this family was the complete opposite of her last home. Quinn was further abused: she was locked in the closet if she came home with a grade lower than an A, or if she dropped something and they saw it. But what hurt the worst was the fact that he would use her chest as an ashtray, when the "mother" wasn't home, causing the burns on her chest._

_One night he took it too far while his wife was at the store with the two younger foster care children in their care. Quinn decked the man and knocked him out cold before bolting to her room and packing her clothes and camera. She was about to leave the room when she saw the card Dana had given her. She snatched it up and left the house. She ran for almost an hour before a cop on a bicycle stopped her. She told him who she was and where she wanted to go and he called a car for back up and followed her and the car to the hospital where Dana worked._

_Dana was on the tail end of her shift in the ER when the cops brought Quinn in again. Dana went and overtook another doctor to get to Quinn. Quinn had blood pouring down her nose and from a split lip as well as the marks on her chest. Dana had brought Quinn over to a table and closed the curtains, keeping the cops outside. Dana treated Quinn before admitting her for the night, and before allowing the cops back in._

_Quinn asked her to stay so she knew one person there as she told her story. Dana agreed. After finishing her story and having it recorded by one of the officers a detective was called in. He listened to the recording and then asked Quinn a few more questions. Afterwards he called Child Services and had them go and remove the two younger children immediately, and he sent the cop who gave Quinn a ride in to arrest both of them. Another car would meet him there to take them in separate cars._

_The detective then turned to Dana._

"_How long until she's released from here?"_

"_I won't know until tomorrow. But at least overnight; I want to make sure she hasn't been concussed" Dana had replied simply. He nodded and left to get ready for the interrogation._

"_What'll happen to me know?" The then 8 year old asked, softly._

"_Well, you'll stay overnight and the nurse who helped you during your last stay will help you tonight. She'll wake you up every few hours to make sure that you don't have a concussion. Then in the morning when I return, I'll take you and get a few more tests to determine how long you'll stay here this time." Dana told her. Quinn had nodded, but still seemed wary._

"_And after I'm released?" She'd seemed almost terrified by the answer._

"_Well talk about that later. I knew I should never have let you go last time." Dana told her as she wheeled Quinn into a room in the Ped's unit. "And I don't plan on letting you go this time. Think you can handle living with twin newborns and a man who is a child himself?" Dana asked her as she helped her to bed._

"_That sounds like Heaven Dr. Dana." Quinn had told her._

_So the next day after it was determined that Quinn would spend the rest of the week in the hospital. She met Mulder when he came in for lunch with Dana. The twins were spending time with Grandma Scully._

_Quinn, warmed up to Mulder pretty quickly once she realized that he was totally in love with Dana and when he spoke to her with no anger or pity in his voice._

_Mulder became attached to Quinn fairly quickly as well. And he asked Dana if they could keep her. Dana had laughed and said that she would talk to Child Services and the detective in charge of her new case. _

_On Friday night, Dana had a Graveyard Shift and Mulder stayed with the twins and Grandma Scully. Dana was supposed to be in the ER, but the Attending in charge that evening told her to head on up to the ped's ward, and Dana had left without questioning the order._

_She entered the ward, and heard screaming coming from a room. One look at the nurse and she knew it was Quinn's room. Dana rushed into the room and found Quinn thrashing in her bed as she screamed for the bastard to stop hurting her. Dana had rushed over to the bed and climbed in beside Quinn before wrapping her arms around the child. Quinn had woken up immediately after feeling Dana's arms come around her. Dana started whispering and rocking Quinn who had started to calm down from her nightmare._

"_Sleep sweet child, all is well. Sleep." Dana whispered in her ear and the child didn't totally fall asleep but she did calm down and relax. She turned over in Dana's arms and snuggled into the embrace._

_Dana's heart melted as she felt the little girl cuddle in closer with her, and she knew then that she wasn't going to let this child go, not until she left for College. So she fished her cell phone out of her lab coat and dialed a very familiar number._

"_Mulder."_

"_It's me. Are you sure you want to keep Quinn?"_

"_Yes, why?"_

"_Because there is no way I'm letting her go again. I am going to let both the detective in charge of her case and Social Services know that I am taking her home on Sunday and filling for adoption. Are you still on good terms Skinner?"_

"_Yup, very good terms with him; I would say that we're almost friends. Again I ask: why?"_

"_I thought it might be a good idea to have a character witness, my boss will be mine and Skinner will be yours. In the morning call him and ask him to look into the process and to write a recommendation letter for you. My boss is already typing mine. But get it done, I don't want to have to let her go, again."_

"_Okay Babe, I'll call him tomorrow once the sun is fully awake. You just concentrate on your job and don't worry about it. Love you."_

"_Love you too. See you when I get home."_

_Dana hung up the phone and put it away before wrapping her arms around the little girl._

"_I am going to try my hardest to keep you." She whispered in her ear._

"_Will I still have to call you Dr. Dana?" Quinn whispered back._

"_No, sweetie you won't." Dana answered with a chuckle._

"_Can I call you Mom, then?" She asked, picking her head up to look at Dana._

"_Of course baby girl, of course you can call me mom." Dana told her and watched as Quinn smiled and fell asleep._

End Flashback.

So Dana and Mulder had adopted Quinn and Quinn had come home with her on Sunday evening. She instantly simmered with the twins and was the third quickest person to calm them down after Dana and Mulder. Maggie instantly loved her as well, though Charlie and Bill took a little time to warm up to her and she to them. She still wasn't quite as comfortable around Bill, probably because Mulder wasn't comfortable around him either. But she quickly blossomed in her new home and started to warm back up to people her age and her talent with a camera shined through.

Dana was brought from her musings by a pair of arms hugging her. She hugged Quinn back and kissed her cheek.

"Please don't become the type of teenager to suddenly dislike and hate their parents?" Dana asked her eldest daughter.

"That won't happen to this teenager, mom. I might fight with you and Dad, but I'll never hate you. Now I smell pancakes, so let's go eat." Quinn led her mother back down the stairs and into the kitchen. Fox handed both women a plate with pancakes, sausage and scrambled eggs, with cheddar cheese for Quinn.

Both women kissed his cheek before joining the rest of the family at the table.

Dana's last thought before she started eating was: She was glad that Mulder didn't let her go; she was glad she fought the cancer when it returned.


End file.
